Last night I went to a partyish situation and for a moment I got all high and judgemental. But I still had a shit ton of fun and met some awesome people. It was like, 20 minutes of my night I was feeling judgey-ish: Here are things I got judgemental about:
- There were a bunch of people wearing totally douche bag scarfs even though it’s pretty warmish out. I’ve like, never even seen so many scarfs in one apartment before.
- This chick was wearing roughly seven layers… of tank tops. And a scarf.
- Some guy laughed at me because I’ve never smoked out of a bong before and I know he was just being all like, nice and funny about it, but he had a scarf so I hated him and I was like, “Is this guy laughing at me for never doing this before?!” “No, I’m just laughing because it’s fun watching people do things for the first time.” So that’s when I decided he probably raped virgins because you don’t wear scarfs with a beard like that while making comments like that without being a virgin raper.
- Probably, I mean?
Then this chick came in and… Listen. This is why I need to stop being judgemental. She came in and she was saying things and I literally, for just a moment, thought she was a total retarded person. And I was saying to myself, “why is her attractiveish, seemingly intelligent boyfriend with her? How did this happen?” Then I noticed they had RINGS. On their FINGERS. MARRIED?! In my head, things started to make sense. They were together for one of two reasons:
- It was a The Notebook type situation. She has brain tumors and he wanted to marry her because they were high school sweet hearts, but now the brain tumors are growing and that’s why she’s retarded. That poor girl. But… How Ryan Gosling-esque of that man. Noble. Noble.
- Orrr… She got into a car accident a few days after they got married. He feels too guilty to divorce her, so he takes care of her.
But you know what, guys? It turns out she was awesome. She was awesome and not retarded. She was my favorite person of the night, I’m thinking. She was totally hilarious to me. And I’m a total asshole for judging people before I even talk to them.
She’s in her last semester of getting her Early Education degree and when I told her I may be getting into that next year, she gave me some really nice tips about taking the tests and everything. Then she started to compliment me endlessly for 20 minutes (endlessly for 20 minutes? HAH.), and that’s NOT EVEN the reason why I liked her. Next thing you know she’s on the couch next to me, stroking my head hairs? Which totally made me uncomfortable because I’m not really all about strangers touching me, but I minded it a lot less than I usually do.
Anyway, last night was just a Life Lesson for me. I learned it all in 20 minutes, too.
I am a scholar of myself. Fucking Greek philosopher-esque.
