Mrs. Bean
So much worse.
I bought a new denim skirt today from a different Salvation Army. I have now spent over $25 on denim dresses/skirts for my Pippi Longstockings costume.
First dress - too small.
Second dress - I had to cut it since it went to my ankles, and you can’t be Pippi Longstockings without your long stockings showing. I cut it too short. At first I thought it would be okay. My vagina was covered. I could just wear tightish black pants, no big deal. Turned around and that’s when I realized that I didn’t make the back longer than the front. Do you know what dresses are slightly longer in the back? Because if they’re not, they don’t cover your ass one bit.
This denim skirt - again, to my ankles. I’m terrified of cutting it. I just safety pinned it up. I then cut the top half of the second dress, so now it looks like I have a denim vest and a denim skirt of two different colors. Which is fine, Pippi is a ragamuffin. The bottom of the “vest” is crooked as fuck.
Also? I ripped the “vest” while cutting it off. So I started to sew it. I finished it, and then realized I sewed the material underneath it as well. I sewed the front to the back. Great. Awesome.
I am normally so good at Halloween. I have never been more upset.
I’m thisclose to just keeping my Pippi hair, throw 25 hamburgers in my purse, and then stay silent until every one is drunk. Then I will throw hamburgers at their faces, while screaming that I am Wendy.
