As a very young child I dreamt of creating the world’s largest map. It would have been life size and easy to make since I would simply trace the coastlines and highways onto a giant sheet of paper. I didn’t think about the numerous flaws in this plan, how it could never work out, how I would never prosper, I was too blind-sided with what an amazing idea it was.
That is what life feels like.
Last night I was looking into my compact mirror as a friend was telling a story. I interrupted him, straight up talked right over whatever words he was saying that I wasn’t listening to because I am an asshole and other people are inconsequential to my life, and said in a panic, “I have eye wrinkles and I still have acne and yesterday when I furrowed my brow in the mirror I realized one of the wrinkles momentarily stayed when I released the hold and I’m 22 and I still live with my parents and I don’t know what I’m DOING ANYMORE.”
There was a beat of silence, and then an “Oh,” and then more silence and then, “you really just unloaded all of your problems in one go,” and then I apologized.
