I fell asleep last night without changing out of my jeans and washing my face. If you know me, you know that this is a testament to how I accidentally passed out. I ALWAYS wash my face when I’m sleeping under my own roof, no matter how tired I am.
I don’t know, the point of me writing this is to delay me getting out of bed. I’ve been awake for over an hour now, but it’s so fucking cold in my room because I like to set my air conditioning between “fuck the environment” and “straight up destroying Polar Bear homes”. It is so cold that I can’t get out of bed. I’m wearing jeans and I have a giant, poofy comforter over me and I swear to you — I swear to you — I think I’m never happier than when it’s fucking freezing and I just cuddle up with a giant blanket and more pillows than is necessary for one woman to own.
To put this all in perspective, it’s 70 Degrees out. This is completely unnecessary. I didn’t go outside and check a thermometer, because that would be ridiculous. I just googled it. I googled the weather instead of getting out of bed.
Actually, writing this all out, I’m pretty sure I’m just clinically depressed. I’m pretty sure that when the only thing that brings you joy is a warm bed in a freezing atmosphere, it just means you need a new doctor.
It is so cold. How long can I stay in this bed before my bladder explodes? Why don’t I care about the environment?