Wait, what.

How I Will Absolutely Win $50,000 on a Radio Contest Tomorrow:

1. Heard on the radio a contest wherein the DJ reads off the first 4 digits in the serial number of a dollar bill and the ninth caller with a matching bill wins a bunch of money to rub all over their face.
2. Realize you work at a bank.
3. Withdraw your entire bank account in dollar bills.
4. Consider running away because you feel so goddamn rich.
5. Take pictures of you and your money for your blog.
6. Enter the first 4 digits of the serial number into Excel. (I did the math - this will take about 2 hours.)
7. Sit in parking lot of school with my computer and bag of money, because I have a final at 8 AM and the drawing is at 7:30 and I can’t very well use my laptop while driving to school… Probably.

Did I take multiple pictures of the cash? Yeah. Did I take multiple pictures of me with the cash? I will in a second. Did I take pictures of me outside with 2450 one dollar bills covering my naked body so I can send those pictures to Li’l Wayne in prison? Well, no, but I’m trying to find a flaw in that idea and I just can’t. I just can’t.